MAMA SAY WHAT? THE BEST BURGER ON EARTH! REALLY???????

LUCKYS FAMOUS
370 West 52nd St.
Between 8th & 9th Ave
NYC

Everyone cheats sometimes, right?

There is no denying that my burger heart belongs to “The Burger Joint” in The Park Meridien Hotel. But the slutty appetite of mine just can’t help but itching to go to the new “Luckys Famous” branch near my job in mid-town. Now, any place that advertises themselves as “The Best …” was, well, to use Triumph The Insult Comic Dog‘s mantra, “ For me to Poop On!”. But it did intrigue my interest. So I set my foot into this orange & yellow-gone-wild little dive with great expectation and suspicion. The blond “dude” behind the register looked like he hasn’t acted since “Point Break”. I went simple.

CHEDDAR BURGER
LUCKY FRIES
VANILLA MILK SHAKE

The guy flipped his shoulder-length hair and took the whopping $14. Hey, how come he didn’t ask me how I would like my burger to be done? SUSPICION #1! The young Latin cook peeked his head out to examine the size of my “girls”. I tried to avoid his stare by studying the menu on the wall. CHEDDAR BURGER EGG ROLL?! Okay, this could just be the beginning of a disaster. I started to pray that no one spit nor violated my food.

My order arrived shortly. The burger was layered with chopped white onions, sliced pickles, lettuce, tomato, and mustard. SUSPICION #2!!! Who decided to put all these bells and whistles on my burger?! What were they trying to hide?! I took a tentative bite. The patty was thinner and greasier than I thought, but surprising, QUITE TASTY! With all the what should-we-call-it added on, it actually created the theme-park flavor that would sure to please any kids (real and grown-ups).

The fries were the thick-cut, crinkly kind. They turned out to be crunchy on the outside and melting from the inside. Not bad. I tried dipping them into the “Lucky sauce”, which tasted like Thousand Island Dressing, except the person fell asleep while adding mayonnaise. Bad idea. The “hot sauce” was much better. With hints of hot pepper mixed with ketch-up and mayo, it tangoed seductively with the fries in my mouth.

I took a gulp of the thick vanilla shake. It went down smoothly but tasted a tad too sweet to my liking. I took a deep breath and started to relax and enjoy the food. Seeing the next table of five kids quieted down once they bit into their burgers, I made a mental notice to bring my lovin’ hubby here next time. He would like it. After all, who wouldn’t enjoy a much more sophisticated version of the McDonalds? And I might just go wild and order the cheddar burger egg roll!

But I still would not call it “the best burger on earth.”